Having kids is not all it’s cracked up to be.
For one thing, you have a tiny human being in your house. This is almost as bizarre as having an animal in your house, but at least animals have fur. All my son has is tons and tons of drool.
For the most part it’s fun to have him around, except of course for the drain on my finances, the stress on my marriage, the elimination of my social life, the inability to sleep, the constant threat of fecal explosion, etc. It’s actually very much like running a farm; at the beginning there was even some milking.
I know this is old news; everyone already knows that kids are a drag. But not all kids are a drag in the same ways.
Here then, is a list of things I hate about my son*, and my son only.