26 Sep

Dad and Buried Posted in Lists 13 comments

How To Explain Trump To Kids

My six-year-old won’t be watching the first presidential debate tonight because a) he’s six and b) he doesn’t need to hear the terrible things people will say during the debate, and by “people” I mean me and by “terrible things” I mean the filthy words I will be yelling at the screen every time Trump speaks.

In a perfect world, Donald Trump will get crushed in November and retreat back to one of his gross hotels, never to be seen again except all the time everywhere because he is a craven opportunist with absolutely no shame and the media worships him. But that’s fine, he can have his TV appearances, so long as I never have to explain to my kids why a misogynistic bigot is President of the United States.

But it’s possible, and in order to be prepared for that possibility, I’ve begun trying to think of ways to explain President Trump in terms my six-year-old can understand.

25 Aug

Dad and Buried Posted in Music 3 comments

Who Needs Beat Bugs?

When I found out I was going to be a dad, I had a lot of plans.

Not “this will never happen” stuff or “I’m going to do things the right way! stuff – I knew even before he was born that my pre-parent ideas were unlikely to stand up to reality. But I had a lot of ideas about what I wanted to teach my son, especially when it comes to pop culture stuff I planned to pass down.

Some of them are still pending – I still can’t wait to show my kids The Karate Kid and introduce them to “The Wire” when they’re older – but a few of them have taken hold with Detective Munch already, particularly Star Wars, superheroes, and The Beatles.

So while I appreciate Netflix’s cool new show, I’m happy to say I beat “Beat Bugs” to the punch!

Read more about Who Needs Beat Bugs? …

02 Feb

Dad and Buried Posted in Babies 3 comments

Chef Boy

My son has had a free ride long enough.

He’s had five years and several months of being the only game in town. But last month, things changed. His baby brother arrived, and now if Detective Munch wants to stay in our good graces, he needs to step up his game.

Luckily, I have the perfect solution.

Stuck Inside with Kids

More power to our kids, but nothing makes a person hate snow more than being an adult. There are only so many times you can take your kids sledding and ice skating and snowman-building, especially when you have things to do!

No matter how outdoorsy you are, in the winter you’re sure to be spending more and more time indoors with a collection of five-hour-energy side-effects in tiny human form, slowly but surely exhausting every single entertainment option available in an effort to keep the kids occupied. And keep yourself from turning into Jack Nicholson in The Shining. It’s not easy.

And it’s only going to get worse for me, now that I have a newborn too.

18 Dec

Dad and Buried Posted in Future 2 comments

We Are All Zookeepers

You love animals, right?

Of course you do, because who doesn’t love animals? (Mom and Buried!) Of course, there’s a difference between loving animals and devoting your life to them, and I wish someone had told me that before I became a parent, because what are young children but animals without fur?

That’s why I relate to this month’s 1 in 100 Million video. Being a parent and being a zookeeper aren’t all that different.

But don’t take my word for it.

Read more about We Are All Zookeepers …

Dad and Buried

Tag: education

How To Explain Trump To Kids

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Chef Boy

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Stuck Inside with Kids

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We Are All Zookeepers

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