13 Ways Parenting is Like Going to an Amusement Park

13 Ways Parenting is Like Going to an Amusement Park

Everyone knows that living with a toddler isn’t all fun and games. In fact, I’ve spent a fair amount of time whining about the fact that it’s NO fun and games.

Today I’m going to let you in on a little secret: it’s SOME fun and games.

A lot of it is stressful and loud and crowded and dirty, but the good parts make it all worth it. So, no: living with a toddler is NOT like being in prison (except when it is). It’s actually more like going to an amusement park.

Allow me to explain…

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Toddlers and Technology

Toddlers and Technology

Parents Have Secrets Too

Parents Have Secrets Too

Part of being a good parent is teaching your children right from wrong.

In order to do that, they have to believe that you occupy the moral high ground, that you have the authority to judge what is right and what is wrong. You can do this in two ways: you can explain that you learned the difference over a lifetime of experimenting, testing boundaries, and making countless mistakes – which will backfire until your kid is at least 25 and finally understands enough about life that he gets it; or, you can lie.

Unfortunately, when you’re trying to be a role model for your kids, it’s not the fun kind of lying that works. It’s the lies of omission. Because parents have secrets too.

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[E-card] Who’s the Boss?

[E-card] Who’s the Boss?

Pre-Natal Post: “Getting a Blown Job”

Pre-Natal Post: “Getting a Blown Job”

Years ago, before I had a blog, I wrote for an online magazine called Intrepid Media. It had a small but dedicated following, and my style was much the same as it is now: bitter, sarcastic, something of a put-on, just less-developed and almost completely non-child related. I didn’t have a kid yet, so the topics were more varied, if you think writing about being irrationally angry about many different things qualifies as variety.

I thought I’d occasionally re-post an article from the now defunct magazine. Why? I’m not sure. They are old – I wrote a column a month for about 10 years, before stopping in early 2011 (give-or-take one or two more) – and dated and re-reading them makes me cringe, but whatever, sometimes you need to re-post old stuff just fill out a week.

This one seems appropriate for several reasons, which may or may not become apparent when you finish reading it. Enjoy! Or don’t enjoy, because either way, without Intrepid Media and the posts that will be featured in this new “series,” I would never have met Mom and Buried. And Detective Munch would not exist. The writing is just gravy.

And so, the first Pre-Natal post.

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