12 Mar

Dad and Buried Posted in discipline 8 comments

I Love Lying to My Kid

Kids lie. No matter how hard you stress the importance of honesty, they will still lie. It’s human nature.

My kid isn’t even three years old and I’ve already seen inklings. I’m not always sure that’s he truly lying about not having pooped or if he’s just so used to having poop in his pants that he can’t tell the difference, but sometimes he’s lying about it. Because he doesn’t want his diaper changed. Because he’s gross. But I digress.

Dealing with lying children is a natural part of being a parent. I knew that going in, and I’m ready for it.

But I didn’t know how much lying I’d be doing.

05 Mar

Dad and Buried Posted in Fear 5 comments

The Amityville Toddler

The other day, my wife asked me why I had put her keys under the couch.

Obviously, I had not done that. My toddler had.

This must be what it’s like to have a ghost.

04 Mar

Dad and Buried Posted in Fear 7 comments

Toddlers Are Fearless And It’s Terrifying

My son likes to play this game called “Give Mommy and Daddy a heart attack!”

The rules are simple: he goes about his normal, everyday business, and Mom and Buried and I freak out at every stupid and dangerous thing he does that nearly gets him killed. Toddlers are fearless, to a fault.

Obviously, it’s not quite as fun for us.

22 Feb

Dad and Buried Posted in Drinking 4 comments

Toddlers and College Students: Same Difference

I loved college.

While there are always exceptions, it’s almost hard not to love college. For many kids, it’s the first taste of freedom, a hint of real life without any of the “real” part. You live on your own, you hang out with big groups of friends, you have unfettered access to the opposite sex. Sure, you have some “responsibilities,” but with a little common sense it doesn’t take much to maintain them and still have plenty of time to just have fun.

When you’re in college, you don’t yet know what you don’t know and, as a result, life is blissful. Everything’s in front of you. It’s not until you graduate and spend a few years in the real world that you realize how good you had it.

Being a parent is a different kind of education – one that kind of works in reverse, in that it’s a bit of a grind and you don’t see a lot of the payoff until much later – that’s only if your kids don’t grow up to be assholes. But a good fifteen years removed – and no, I will not be attending any reunions so don’t paw at me with your dirty little guild – I am able to see some similarities between the life of a college student and that of a toddler.

07 Feb

Dad and Buried Posted in Advice 3 comments

Dadding Practice

Before he was even a twinkle in my eye, I had some ideas about what I wanted to teach my hypothetical son. Most of us do; without necessarily meaning to, we all take stock of what worked for us as kids, what we vow never to do as parents, what values we consider most important, etc. When you finally have children of your own, it’s a bit of a thrill to realize just how important you are to them, and how much influence you have over their development.

But my son is only two; it’s a bit early to tell him to always wear a rubber and when to double down. He needs to be able to swing off a tee before I can toss any real heat his way. But that doesn’t stop me from occasionally buzzing one by his ear.

Dad and Buried

Tag: Kids

I Love Lying to My Kid

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The Amityville Toddler

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Toddlers Are Fearless And It’s Terrifying

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Toddlers and College Students: Same Difference

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Dadding Practice

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