I love my kids, I just hate parenting
I started this blog with the intent of pulling back the curtain on parenthood. Giving people the real scoop on what it’s like to raise a kid, free of all the ooh-ing and ah-ing and BS. I’m not going to pull punches when I discuss how radically having a baby has changed my life, both in good ways and bad, and today I’m here to give a status report. After the jump.
I know I spend a lot of time on this blog talking shit about how having a baby is going to destroy my life. One week in and it turns out I am freaking Nostradamus: all of my fears are already coming true! No sleep, no sex, no social life. Blah blah blah. And it’s only going to get worse.
But there are some things I am looking forward to, and a lot of things I didn’t expect. Good things.
At the risk of getting all soft and sentimental, I’m going to share the most amazing and unexpected part of being a new dad. No, it’s not how much I already love him, or how little I care about being woken up when he cries, or how inexplicably colorful his crap is.
It’s something even crazier.
Listen up: it’s time to get educated.
I’ve been a proud papa for just under a week now and I’ve already learned a few things about babies. A few valuable things that I think might come in handy for those of you out there who are considering purchasing a new child. Trust me, dealing with an infant is no easy task, but with the insights I’ve gleaned – and will continue to glean as I mold my son into the Greatest Of All Time – I can help make things just a little bit easier for new parents.
Coming up after the jump, my top five insights into about babies and how they work. Here’s a quick tease to whet your appetite: Babies smell like Cheerios. Or feces. Depends on what time it is.
Also, as a bonus to my loyal readers, I’ve included a picture of my son at the bottom of the post!
Kid’s not even born and he already has a lot to answer for.
I am not a religious man. I certainly don’t believe that a literal Adam and a literal Eve were chilling in a literal garden when a literal snake offered them literal fruit from the literal Tree of Knowledge.
But after sitting vigil during my wife’s labor and delivery, I am coming around to the idea of Original Sin.
Today is my birthday. But, despite all the doctors and their fancy prognostication machines, it doesn’t look like it will be my son’s. Originally, when MomandBuried and I learned our son’s due date – which is today, by the way – I wasn’t exactly thrilled at the prospect of sharing my birthday with my kid.Read more about Birth Day?[…]