Ready Or Not

Ready Or Not

Of all the questions I hear most often these days – “How is your wife feeling?” and “When is the baby due?” and “Wow, have you been working out?”- the one that gives me the most pause is “Are you ready?”

Sometimes that’s followed with “to rumble?” and then things get real in a hurry, but usually it’s obvious that they are really just asking me if I’m prepared for the awesome responsibility of becoming a father.

Most of the time, I acknowledge the person’s superficial interest and half-hearted feint at concern by offering one of three quick responses – “Yes?” or “I hope so!” or “As ready as I’ll ever be, I guess” – and then moving on to something else. After all, most people that ask don’t really care. They’re just being polite. And nosy.

The question is the dad-to-be’s equivalent to the constant “how are you feeling?” query that pregnant women are faced with, and – as I mentioned above – it’s easy to dismiss. But should I deign to give it some real thought, it can send me spiraling into an existential black hole that can only be filled with crying jags, drunken fisticuffs and some cutting.

Maybe I’m being too hard on myself. Is it even possible to really be ready to become a parent?

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Time To Be A Role Model?

Time To Be A Role Model?

The other day, my wife gently let me know that she was a little concerned with the language I used in my last post. That’s not an MP, I said. That’s a YP.

But then, the next day…

The doctor told us she loved the way my wife’s cervix looked. She used terms like effacement and dilated and etc. She says it should be any day now.

Let me repeat: It should be any day now that I will have a son. Yikes.

Does this change everything? Is it time for me to tone down my language, reconsider some of my actions in the face of becoming a father. Is what was just a few days ago purely a YP now an MP?

Is it time for Dad and Buried to grow up? Can I?

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Raising A Champion

Raising A Champion

On the eve of my son’s birth, I’ve been thinking a lot about my parenting style, and which lessons I want to impart to my heir. Basically, WWCTD: What Would Coach Taylor Do?

There are a lot of horrible children out there, and most of the blame obviously lies with videogames and Marilyn Manson and Avatar-related depression. But some of it lies with their parents. I am not going to be one of those parents whose kid is a loser. My son is going to dominate. But he can’t do it on his own, so I’ve come up with a list of ten values that will serve as a guideline for him as he grows up.

To make sure he toes the line and doesn’t defy me, I’ve included a video counterpoint with each lesson on the list. That way, should he feel himself straying, he’ll be able to recognize the signs. Check out the list after the jump.

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What If I Hate My Kid?

What If I Hate My Kid?

It’s a real concern, isn’t it? Having a kid that you can’t stand?

A few disclaimers: I’m not talking about hating having a kid; there is a lot that comes with parenting that is just not fun, but that doesn’t mean you hate the kid because of it. Until the kid gets a personality, he’s not really hate-able as a person. He’s hate-able as an entity – nobody likes a crying, fussy, messy baby – but that’s not what I’m talking about.

It’s another thing if your kid doesn’t share your interests; that’s normal, especially once he becomes a teenager. But that’s not what I’m talking about either.

Find out what I mean, after the jump.
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My Fantasy Draft Versus The Birth of My Child

My Fantasy Draft Versus The Birth of My Child

The end of summer brings with it a few milestones for Dad and Buried.

One is the arrival of my first child, another is the arrival of my 10th or 11th or maybe even 12th season (who remembers?) of Fantasy Football. My baby’s due date is not set in stone; he’ll come when he feels like it.

My league’s draft date, however, is August 21st, and that is non-negotiable!

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