The Gifts That Keep on Giving… Headaches

The Gifts That Keep on Giving… Headaches

As I discussed last week, Christmas is a double-edged sword.

The kid got way too many toys for Christmas and he had way too many toys already. But it’s not always the quantity of toys that is the problem. It’s the quality. Some toys are educational, some are musical, some are harmless and some are the devil.

Every kid has received a gift that immediately becomes the bane of their parents’ existence, for a variety of potential reasons. After a morning spent nursing a headache one of those gifts had given me, I reached out online and asked other parents what one gift they wished their child had never received, and why.

Here were the top three responses, plus one slightly more universal item:

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Spoiler Alert

Spoiler Alert

Sometimes I worry that I love my son too much.

I was thinking about that this Christmas, when I saw the haul of toys he received from his parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles, and watched as he was indoctrinated into the Culture of More. It definitely made for a fun holiday – the joy of little kids can be contagious – but it also made me nervous.

There’s a reason we call it “spoiling.” Overindulgence breeds assholes.

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The Inconvenience Store

The Inconvenience Store

I am on record as a Stay-at-home Dad who isn’t a big fan of being a stay-at-home dad.

There are some things I like about it, such as spending quality one-on-one time with my son and slowly making myself his favorite parent, thus severing the sacred bond between mother and son. But everything else? Pretty much sucks.

Especially going grocery shopping with kids.

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Mobility is Overrated

Mobility is Overrated

We’re all so impressed by mobility these days.

Our favorite technology is all about portability and size and convenience. We have the Internet in our pockets, computers on our wrists, and borderline-Skynet in ridiculous eye-wear that makes Geordie La Forge look hip. All your computers are belong with us, all of the times.

I’m due for an iPhone upgrade this fall but I’m scared the 6 will be too big for my delicate BUT LARGE ENOUGH, LADIES! hands. This from a kid who grew up playing Oo Topos on a huge box monitor with a data tower bigger than my three-year-old. I haven’t had a desktop computer in around 15 years.

Until now.

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Dear God, What Have We Done? – Part 1 (To Him)

Dear God, What Have We Done? – Part 1 (To Him)

So this weekend we celebrated our son’s “second” Christmas, but since, if memory serves, he spent his actual first Christmas crying and pooping and sleeping with nary any clue of what all the fuss was about, this was more like his real actual first Christmas. And being that he’s only 15 months old, we weren’t even sure this one would count.

But we were wrong.

The kid took to Christmas like Tim Tebow takes to scruff, or Tim Tebow takes to evangelism, or Tim Tebow takes to not being able to play quarterback. (See Part 2 here.)

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