Parenthood Is a Cult

Parenthood Is a Cult

As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to join a cult.

Wait, no. I’ve always been fascinated by cults.

From Jonestown to Hale-Bopp, from the Manson Family to Scientology, the psychology of those kinds of groups – and the people who fall prey to them – has interested me.

But I never thought I’d join one myself. Then I had a kid.

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Boneheaded Parenting Mistakes

Boneheaded Parenting Mistakes

Everyone has grand plans for how they’ll parent. They’re going to do everything right, and be the perfect mom or dad, and raise the world’s best kid. Becoming a parent forces you to make sacrifices.

And then you have kids. And suddenly you’re in the shit. And when you’re in the shit, things change.

Instead of doing everything right, you start doing plenty of things wrong, making boneheaded parenting mistakes that are probably bad for them, and are definitely bad for you.

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Celebrity Parenting Advice is Meaningless

Celebrity Parenting Advice is Meaningless

Taking celebrity advice is idiotic. Taking celebrity parenting advice is even worse.

I’m not gonna tell anyone to “shut up and dribble” or to stick to rapping, no matter how ridiculous their comments might be. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and if we’re gonna get mad that a famous person uses their platform to spout theirs, then maybe we shouldn’t have made that person famous to begin with. The fact is, getting parenting advice from almost anyone – other parents, your parents, non-parents, coworkers, that close-minded anti-Trumper with a dad blog – is one of the small tortures of this lifestyle.

But there’s something worse about celebrity parenting advice.

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Questionable Parenting in A QUIET PLACE

Questionable Parenting in A QUIET PLACE

Over the weekend, Mom and Buried and I went to the movies. We were visiting my family in Connecticut and we took advantage of the free babysitting to see A Quiet Place.

I enjoyed the movie but I had some issues with it. Particularly with the parenting.

First things first: if you live in a world ravaged by monsters that rely on sound to find you, DON’T GET PREGNANT!

Nonstop spoilers ahead. DON’T CONTINUE IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE MOVIE.

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Parenting One-Upmanship

Parenting One-Upmanship

Parents are a competitive bunch.

Despite the fact that every single one of us is just taking shots in the dark and flying by the seat of our pants, we’re still constantly trying to one-up each other when it comes to both our parenting styles and our kids’ accomplishments. Instead of uniting against our children, the authors of our pain, procreation tends to make parents close ranks and face off against one another.

In multiple ways.

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