I love my kids, I just hate parenting
On Monday, Mom and Buried took The Hammer to the playground.
They ran into a pre-K classmate and my 5yo was so PSYCHED you’d have thought he’d fallen in love with Katie Holmes! He spent the next few hours running around like Tom Cruise on Oprah: having the time of his life (and freaking everyone else out).
Who could blame him?
I’ve been a father for almost 11 years, but I haven’t felt like one for nearly that long.
“Imposter syndrome” refers to the feelings of doubt one has about their abilities and accomplishments, and brings with it the fear of being exposed as a fraud. It’s usually mentioned in regards to one’s professional life (which: YES), but I actually feel it more frequently as a parent.
Every morning when I wake up – often forcefully, thanks to my toddler – I’m starting from zero. I live in perpetual fear that my kids are suddenly going to realize I have no idea what I’m doing.
Two years ago, I lost my job. Over that summer, my wife got one. Suddenly, I was home alone with my kids every day.
I was a stay-at-home dad again, a role I didn’t love the first time when I had one two-year-old, and one I wasn’t looking forward to this time around, with two sons.
My fears were realized when it took just two days for me to lose my patience, and I wrote an Instagram post about how ill-suited I was to be at home.
And then a funny thing happened: my wife told me I was doing a great job.
Did you know I have a podcast? I do, it’s called The Dad and Buried Podcast, and much like this blog, and my Instagram, and my Facebook page, and my Twitter, it’s a platform I use to complain about parenting and mock my kids. I started it with my friend Pete, and over the fast few months, Mom and Buried has been joining me as well.
Oh, and we just recorded our 100th episode. Read more about 100 Episodes! …
Being the bad cop sucks.