Split Personality

Split Personality

You hit the jackpot.

You’re able to get away for a night or two, get someone to watch the kid and grab a nice dinner, get a nice buzz, and relax. You’re granted a brief reprieve from the terrible twos or terrible threes or whatever the case may be, and you have a well-deserved night or two of child-free fun. It’s been a long time coming, and it won’t be coming along again anytime soon.

And yet, despite your need for time away from him, you can’t help but miss your kid. Despite your better instincts, you actually can’t wait to get home and see him!

Until you do.

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Concession Stand

Concession Stand

Mom and Buried and I spent the weekend enjoying a local music festival. We knew from the start that Detective Munch wouldn’t be accompanying us to the many night-time shows, but – because we wanted him to experience some live music, which he loves – we took some of the daytime events.

On Saturday, we went to the less interesting (read: bluegrass) bands that were playing outside somewhere, rather than inside some dank dive bar my son couldn’t get into. It worked out okay; the kid got to dance and interact with dogs and strangers and we got to have a beer or two while doing our best to prevent our son from getting bit by disgruntled dogs and strangers.

It’s called compromise, and it’s part of being a parent. But on the eve of his third birthday, it’s time for my kid to start holding up his end of the bargain.

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Zombie Post: A Wolf in Grandma’s Clothing

Zombie Post: A Wolf in Grandma’s Clothing

We’re on “vacation,” visiting my parents in Connecticut. The person who is truly on vacation – no-sarcastic-quotation-marks vacation – is my son. He has been getting whatever he wants at the hand of Grandma and Pop-pop – new movies, lots of TV, new toys, ice cream, willing playmates – and as a result, his behaviorRead more about Zombie Post: A Wolf in Grandma’s Clothing[…]

Toddlers Are Assholes

Toddlers Are Assholes

My kid has been a real punk lately.

When your kids are at their most trying, it can make even the most seasoned parent question themselves. I say don’t. Especially if you’re parenting a toddler.

Toddlers are assholes and there’s not much you can do about it. Don’t let them bring you down.

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