08
Oct
Fifty Shades of Parenting
I am not totally against the idea of corporal punishment.
But if my kid swats at my face one more time, I am totally putting him in time-out!
Sigh.
Category: discipline
24
Sep
The Trouble with Grandma
For the past few weeks, we were in the middle of a move, which is no picnic under the best circumstances and just about impossible with a toddler underfoot. So, in order to get everything done, we shipped the kid to his grandparents’.
It worked out well; we were able to pack up and relocate a lot more quickly, and no miniature humans were injured in the process. We even got to go to dinner once or twice without needing to wrangle a psycho into a highchair.
Little did we know that while we were taking care of business, our son was being turned against us.
14
Sep
Patiently Waiting for Patience
I like Guns N’ Roses. Appetite For Destruction is one of the best albums of the 80s, and even the bloated Use Your Illusion double album has a lot of great songs on it. If you want, I’ll even defend parts of Chinese Democracy. What’s that? You don’t want? Fine.
As I try to cultivate my son’s appreciation for my favorite music, there is a fair amount of the GnR catalog I will avoid until he’s older. But even the staunchest GnR hater probably enjoys whistling along with “Patience.”
I’ve been trying to teach my son to whistle that tune, which is basically impossible. But it’s not as impossible as teaching him the actual concept of patience.
14
Sep
Scary for Different Reasons
There’s a movie coming out called Mama, about two feral kids trying to adjust to normal life. Apparently the ghost of their dead mother is lurking around, being all angry at Jessica Chastain for usurping her role. The movie looks freaky, sure. They’re the requisite spider-walk popularized in the Exorcist re-release from a few yearsRead more about Scary for Different Reasons[…]
11
Sep
Feeding Frenzy
It’s so much easier to be fat.
Okay, maybe it’s not easier to actually BE fat. But it’s definitely easier to GET fat.
And it’s a definitely piece of cake (or three) to let your kids get fat. Feeding them is headache enough even when it’s food they like, but you start putting nutrition into the mix and it becomes [insert hilarious Hunger Games reference here].
It’s so much easier to just let him have the damn french fries again.