Category: Future

Puberty Takes No Prisoners
15 Aug
Posted in Future 2 comments

Puberty Takes No Prisoners

As my son’s second birthday approaches, I can’t help but think ahead to what he’ll be like when he’s older. Especially since he is already growing up so fast.

Obviously, I can’t possibly predict my sons future interests based on what he likes as a toddler! I highly doubt he”ll still enjoy “Yo Gabba Gabba,” climbing up and down stairs, and pulling tissues out of boxes as much as he does right now. But I always say “find a job you love and you’ll never work a day in you life,” so go for it, tissue puller!

But really, about the only thing I can predict for him, with nearly 100% accuracy, is that for much of the time between the ages of 12 and 17, he’s going to be hideously ugly.

Read more about Puberty Takes No Prisoners …

Mobility is Overrated
07 Aug
Posted in Future 2 comments

Mobility is Overrated

We’re all so impressed by mobility these days.

Our favorite technology is all about portability and size and convenience. We have the Internet in our pockets, computers on our wrists, and borderline-Skynet in ridiculous eye-wear that makes Geordie La Forge look hip. All your computers are belong with us, all of the times.

I’m due for an iPhone upgrade this fall but I’m scared the 6 will be too big for my delicate BUT LARGE ENOUGH, LADIES! hands. This from a kid who grew up playing Oo Topos on a huge box monitor with a data tower bigger than my three-year-old. I haven’t had a desktop computer in around 15 years.

Until now.

Read more about Mobility is Overrated …

“You’re a Great Dad. Who Knew?”
15 Jun
Posted in Fear One comment

“You’re a Great Dad. Who Knew?”

The title of this post is an exact quote from my wife. Thanks, honey?

It’s a borderline offensive thing to say, but she’s right. No one knew I’d be, let alone expected me to be, a great dad. Or even a good one. Not her. Not you. Least of all me.

Okay. Maybe least of all you.

Read more about “You’re a Great Dad. Who Knew?” …

The Scariest Job in the World
31 Oct
Posted in Fear No comments

The Scariest Job in the World

Last week I wrote a lighthearted piece about my wife’s obsession with Halloween. And I posted this terrifying clip from “Twin Peaks,” featuring a character I truly consider to be the most frightening fictional creation of all time.

Those posts were meant to be fun, and so is Halloween. Being scared is fun (unless you’re my wife or my friend Suj or my older brother Mark) and eating candy is fun and dressing up is fun (especially if you’re my wife or my friend Suj). And having a little kid with whom to experience Halloween makes all of those things even more enjoyable.

Obviously, today actually is Halloween, and while this post may be violating the generally accepted tenor of the holiday, it seems an appropriate time to discuss one of the toughest aspects of being a parent.

It’s completely and utterly terrifying.

Read more about The Scariest Job in the World …

Raising Kids With Religion – or Not
28 Jan
Posted in discipline 9 comments

Raising Kids With Religion – or Not

I was raised Catholic. And like everyone else who was raised Catholic, I am what you might call “lapsed.” (In reality I am actually just “not a Catholic anymore,” but my parents might read this, so let’s go with “lapsed.”)

I don’t put much truck in religion these days; it has its purpose for many, and I don’t begrudge them their beliefs, except of course when they use those beliefs as a rationale for violence and intolerance and hatred and war and etc. Which is a lot of people, but it certainly isn’t the majority. So go ahead and pray if you like; I just won’t be joining you.

But my son might.
Read more about Raising Kids With Religion – or Not …

e9afe31c5a7577fdf2fc8f15bd5008856c363ba4adcd73a03f