17
Jan
Outbreak!
For a minute there I honestly thought my son was a vampire.
Turns out he only had pink eye.
Category: Sacrifice
09
Jan
The Worry-Free Guide to Impending Fatherhood
It was almost exactly two years ago when I discovered I was going to be a father. My level of ignorance on the topic had me pretty nervous, but the nerves are natural. And kind of pointless. Because what I’ve learned after my first full year as a dad is that the key to being a good father is simply this: don’t be an asshole.
Seriously. If you’re already not an asshole, you can skip the rest of this (long) post because that’s all there is to it. Congratulations! Go forth and multiply.
However, I was an asshole. And I didn’t have much guidance when I became a dad. So I offer the following nine-item list (one for each month of pregnancy!) to all the assholes like me who need advice on getting through the nine or so months preceding the birth of the person who will most likely be your end (Oedipus!).
Read more about The Worry-Free Guide to Impending Fatherhood …
07
Dec
Allergies: Yet Another Way My Son is Ruining My Life
Ever see that Brady Bunch episode where it seemed that Jan might be allergic to Mr. Brady? They actually considered a divorce! That actually happened. Just amazing television. What’s next, a series about a diminutive black child who lives with rich white people in a mansion?
Anyway, my wife took my son to the allergist yesterday and guess what happened? Not what happened in The Brady Bunch.
Read more about Allergies: Yet Another Way My Son is Ruining My Life …
02
Nov
Joe: College
My friend Joe Procopio, the publisher and founder of IntrepidMedia.com, just put out a new column about the escalating cost of higher education in this country, what you actually get out of it, and whether it’s worth it. This topic has actually been on my mind a fair amount lately, partially because I’m a newRead more about Joe: College[…]
31
Oct
The Scariest Job in the World
Last week I wrote a lighthearted piece about my wife’s obsession with Halloween. And I posted this terrifying clip from “Twin Peaks,” featuring a character I truly consider to be the most frightening fictional creation of all time.
Those posts were meant to be fun, and so is Halloween. Being scared is fun (unless you’re my wife or my friend Suj or my older brother Mark) and eating candy is fun and dressing up is fun (especially if you’re my wife or my friend Suj). And having a little kid with whom to experience Halloween makes all of those things even more enjoyable.
Obviously, today actually is Halloween, and while this post may be violating the generally accepted tenor of the holiday, it seems an appropriate time to discuss one of the toughest aspects of being a parent.
It’s completely and utterly terrifying.