Be All That You Can Be (Except Any of the Following)

Be All That You Can Be (Except Any of the Following)

I’ve been writing a lot about the dreams my son may have as he grows up and the way life may dash them. But the fact is, despite how hard it is to become a rock star, or how unlikely it may be that he will be a professional athlete, if there’s one country in the world where such outlandish dreams are possible, it’s Canada.

But America ain’t bad either.

Freedom can be a dangerous thing. There are so many ways it can go wrong. In honor of Independence Day, I’ve put together a little list of things my son can be when he grows up, because of our freedom, but that I hope he doesn’t become.

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Sacrifice Try?

Sacrifice Try?

My son has recently become obsessed with playing baseball, waking up every morning and immediately demanding to take some cuts with his plastic bat (and Red Sox ball. REPRESENT!).

I think it’s great that he’s into the sport; it’s a hell of a lot safer than football and I’m glad he’s showing more interest in it than in something like soccer. But it’s gonna hurt when I crush his dreams. Or, more to the point, when his body does.

Sorry, kid. You don’t have the genes for sports.

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Without 2

Without 2

You may have noticed that the blog has been a tad quiet of late, and that’s because the family has been doing a little traveling.

We drove up north. We drove because we wanted to stay flexible, schedule-wise, and because airlines inexplicably charge full-price once your kid turns two-years-old so he can have a seat. But I’d gladly let him sit on my lap for two hours. Deal with occasionally getting kicked, fatso next to me!

The driving made the travel longer, made the use of the computer impossible (hence reduced blog posts), and made me question why I didn’t put my son in a kennel because he’s the one child on earth who doesn’t sleep in the car and man does he get annoying!

But a funny thing happened near the end of the trip.

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Dream Cheater

Dream Cheater

I recently read Keith Richards’s autobiography. I read it to learn more about the recording of some of his band’s seminal albums, and about how he survived doing so many drugs but it got me thinking about what I would do if my son decided to he wanted to be an axman. While describing his childhood, Keith never really discusses what his parents thought of his choice of career, making it seem like they were just bystanders while he chased his dream. Maybe they were, maybe they weren’t, maybe he doesn’t remember their names. But it got me thinking.

I don’t yet know what my son’s dreams will be, but I plan to support them as best I can. The thing is, as a parent I’m sure to have a different perspective on his life and his dreams than he does. Mostly because, by virtue of being older and having lived more life, I have some perspective – which can be both valuable and damaging, and he doesn’t – which can also be both valuable and damaging. The young and the old less-young usually disagree on where the value lies.

This is a source of conflict.

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Zombie Post: From the Mouths of (Those Without) Babes

Zombie Post: From the Mouths of (Those Without) Babes

Yesterday, I wrote about the idiotic gulf that exists between people who have kids and people who don’t. There’s no reason we parents can’t get along with the childless; if I didn’t have childless friends, I’d never be able to escape my own kid! But a year ago, I discussed the one thing in particularRead more about Zombie Post: From the Mouths of (Those Without) Babes[…]

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