Uncommon Courtesy

Uncommon Courtesy

Manners are important. Common courtesy is important. Especially to parents.

It’s gratifying when your kids display those traits, especially toddlers, since they are sociopaths. Nothing makes me more proud than when my son answers someone’s “Thank you,” with “You’re welcome,” or when he deploys an “excuse me” as he squeezes past someone on the stairs.

We stress that kind of simple politeness for a few reasons. For one thing, it’s a simple way to display our parenting skills. If your kid is polite, people automatically assume you’re doing something right. For another, we operate under the assumption that ingraining good manners into children at an early age will make it stick.

But does it?

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Emotionally Unable

Emotionally Unable

Children are surprisingly intelligent and perceptive. Except when they’re not.

My son knows to lie to get what he wants, he knows how to push our buttons to piss us off, he knows how to work my iPhone and he knows I didn’t really steal his nose. I bet yours is the same way; kids are always smarter than you expect. And yet despite their mad skills, when it comes to emotional intelligence they are total morons.

Mine still can’t figure out when an emotional breakdown is warranted (never) and when one isn’t (when your banana breaks).

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The Secret Sexism of Halloween

The Secret Sexism of Halloween

I try not to preach a lot, especially about parenting.

For one thing, I’m not qualified. For another, no one is. But sometimes something gets under my skin so deeply that I can’t let it go, and as my son’s third Halloween approaches – the first where he actively chose his own costume – I have to speak up.

Halloween has become an incredibly sexist holiday. TOWARDS BOYS.

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Fanning the Flames?

Fanning the Flames?

Now that I have a car (stupid North Carolina), I find myself listening to the radio more than I have in years. Of course, the radio is terrible. So I throw on sports talk.

Which is also terrible, especially local sports radio. But the national shows, like ESPN’s morning shows and a few others, are tolerable. This morning, I heard Dan Patrick tell a story about how, one day during the 2004 playoffs, some of his son’s classmates – Yankees fans – pissed on the kid’s Red Sox hat.

Suddenly I’ve started questioning the way I’ve been indoctrinating my son into fandom.

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Care Package

Care Package

Human beings suck. Especially parents. Having kids seems to bring out the worst in a lot of us. For example, when I had a kid I started making gross generalizations about huge swaths of people.

You know who doesn’t suck? Kids. I know, stop laughing; I hate them too. But hear me out.

Obviously, kids suck. They’re terrible. They’re loud and unruly and they don’t listen and they’re stupid and they’re exhausting and they smell. And that’s just MY kid. Don’t even get me started on other people’s.

But you know what else they are? Kind. Innocent. Without a judgmental bone in their bodies. And selfless.

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