04 Jan

Dad and Buried Posted in Future One comment

Expect the Unexpected

A kid in my high school biology class once asked our teacher if a woman could give birth to a snake. And we’ve been close friends ever since!

Thankfully, none of Mom and Buried’s ultrasounds have shown a cobra. And I already have a kid. So even though I’m not a biology teacher, and it’s been five years since I’ve had a newborn baby around and I don’t remember much about how to care for one, I have a pretty good idea of what’s coming (sometime in the next two weeks).

Yet despite the fact that I have an existing child on whom to base my expectations for my second baby’s personality and appearance, in reality, I don’t have a clue. And that’s got me pretty excited.

Read more about Expect the Unexpected …

25 Dec

Dad and Buried Posted in holidays 75 comments

The Worst Gifts For Kids

This isn’t about dangerous toys. I honestly wouldn’t even know where to begin such a list. When I was a kid, if you wore a bike helmet you were King Dork of Nerd Mountain. Nowadays, you need a helmet just to ride the school bus or you’ll end up suing the NFL.

The standards for safety have changed so drastically that I’ve pretty much stopped giving my kid anything that has corners. (I’m not even joking: my son has never had a Saltine. NOTHING BUT RITZ.)

Instead, this list is about the worst gifts for kids. Not all kids, like I said, I can’t speak to that. These are the worst gifts to buy your own children.

17 Dec

Dad and Buried Posted in Lists 6 comments

13 Ways My Second Baby is Like THE FORCE AWAKENS

If you’ve been following my blog lately, you probably know that the new Star Wars movie isn’t the only bundle of joy arriving this holiday season. My new baby will also be making his debut sometime over the next month.

It’s been a while since I’ve written a ridiculous list comparing parenting or kids to something really absurd, and thanks to my friend John Willey over at Daddys In Charge, I’ve been inspired.

So today, to celebrate the opening of the new movie, I give you a list comparing my soon-to-arrive baby to the new Star Wars movie. We’ve actually considered calling him “The Force Awakens” but I’m not sure it makes sense since once he gets here, none of us will ever be sleeping.

16 Dec

Dad and Buried Posted in Charts and Graphs 2 comments

The Force is Strong

Detective Munch and I haven’t been seeing eye-to-eye a lot lately. We tend to butt heads as is, but lately it’s been a bit intense.

I say stop, he says go! I say yes, he says no! I say up, he says left! (We’re working on his opposites.) Some of it is typical five-year-old defiance, some of it is clashing priorities, some of it is matching personalities.

Thankfully, we do have some common ground.

The Vengeful Wife’s Holiday Gift Guide

Moms, I know you love your kids. But don’t you kind of wish you didn’t have to go through pregnancy to get them? I know you love your husbands too, but isn’t it frustrating that they don’t have to experience the grueling marathon of labor?

Damn right it is.

Mom and Buried is at the tail end of a grueling year, and (after you take into account her irresistible looks) she has no one to blame for it but the guy who knocked her up. I know how hard the last nine months have been on Mom and Buried, so you can’t tell me she wouldn’t love a little revenge. I bet you all would.

This holiday season, you’re in luck!

Dad and Buried

Tag: entertainment

Expect the Unexpected

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The Worst Gifts For Kids

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13 Ways My Second Baby is Like THE FORCE AWAKENS

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The Force is Strong

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The Vengeful Wife’s Holiday Gift Guide

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