24 Aug

Dad and Buried Posted in Lists 4 comments

Parenting Skills I Wish I Didn’t Have

When you become a parent, you suddenly need to learn a whole new set of skills.

You’ll be doing things you never thought possible, things for which your pre-baby life never prepared you. The good news is you’ll pick them up pretty quickly. The bad news is that this particular set of skills changes you. It’s impossible to be a halfway decent mom or dad without becoming a slightly lamer person. The evolution is both impressive and soul-crushing.

Many of the skills I’ve acquired are quite useful and, without them, I’d be adrift as a parent. Skills like diaper-changing and baby-holding and swaddling and so on.

Unfortunately, many more of them are skills I wish I hadn’t acquired. Because while they may make me a better parent, they also take me further and further away from my pre-parent self.

02 Aug

Dad and Buried Posted in discipline 34 comments

My (Son’s) Life as a Dog

Can someone please tell me the difference between a dog and a two-year-old?

This is a serious question.

27 Jul

Dad and Buried Posted in stress 58 comments

Top 10 Reasons Why I Hate My Son

Having kids is not all it’s cracked up to be.

For one thing, you have a tiny human being in your house. This is almost as bizarre as having an animal in your house, but at least animals have fur.

All my son has is tons and tons of drool.

09 Jul

Dad and Buried Posted in Drinking 367 comments

The Pros and Cons of Preferential Treatment

My son likes my wife more than he likes me.

Yup. He’s a bit of a mama’s boy. But it’s normal for young kids to have an attachment to their mom; after spending nine months living in someone’s body, and then another year or so relying on that body for sustenance, you’d get attached too. Besides, he’s not even two, so I’m not super concerned that he’ll develop into some freaky Norman Bates type guy. Yet.

But I understand why he likes Mom more than dear old Dad. But that doesn’t mean her preferential treatment doesn’t occasionally hurt my feelings.

Except when it works to my advantage.

28 Jun

Dad and Buried Posted in discipline 6 comments

Not My Kid, Not My Problem

Large groups of toddlers make me very uncomfortable. Simply surviving the tornado that is my own (almost) two-year-old is a daily workout. When there is a group of these creatures underfoot, my blood pressure goes through the roof.

I’ve written about the struggles of keeping my son in check when visiting a friend’s home, but today’s post is not about my kid; it’s about everyone else’s.

My kid gives me enough stress. If it’s not my kid? It’s not my problem.

Dad and Buried

Tag: motherhood

Parenting Skills I Wish I Didn’t Have

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My (Son’s) Life as a Dog

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Top 10 Reasons Why I Hate My Son

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The Pros and Cons of Preferential Treatment

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Not My Kid, Not My Problem

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