And the post-Xmas hangover begins. (Not an actual hangover, unfortunately. It seems having baby has transformed me into a teetotaler. These days I can’t seem to get past 3 beers without falling asleep on the couch.) More like a “back to work with no reprieve in sight” kind of hangover. I need a nap.

You know who else needs a nap? My son. Unfortunately, he’s not so great at taking them. (Things he IS great at? Shoving his fists in his mouth. Tummy time. Smiling. Pooping. Shoving his fists in his mouth. Burping. Did I mention “shoving his fists in his mouth”? Kid loves to eat his hands!)

But he sucks at falling asleep.

That’s not entirely true – he’s pretty good at it, at night. But that took some doing. It’s the napping thing he can’t get a handle on. Like his father, he has an aversion to napping. Maybe he hates sleeping through the day, or maybe it takes him so long to fall asleep that it makes the idea of a catnap totally irrelevant. Maybe he just hates waking up and feeling like crap. The kid can’t talk, so in reality I have no fucking idea why he doesn’t nap, but it’s driving my wife and I crazy.

It’s not just that we need some quiet time. I mean, as I linked to above,we were more than willing to torture the guy until he gave in and starting sleeping through the night; obviously we’ll do whatever it takes to get a breather from parenting. But when it comes to napping, we want him to grab some quick shuteye for his own good! He gets overtired and grumpy but he can’t bring himself to power down for an hour or so. The most we get is about twenty minutes, and then he’ll suddenly he wake up and get caught staring at my bare ass while I try to squeeze in some alone time with the old lady. AWKWARD.

Needless to say, I can’t have that happen again.

So anyone got any tips for getting the kid to realize when he needs seize the opportunity and get some afternoon Zs? The last thing I want to have to do is put the sleeper hold on the kid.

But I will.

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