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I’m not a cannibal, but if I were, I’d be an infant-arian. A Wee-gan. There’s a reason veal is so expensive – young meat is the best meat.
I won’t lie; sometimes he’s not quite so appetizing, like when I’m changing his diaper. But sometimes it’s like I’m in a cartoon starving my ass off and he’s a succulent drumstick just staring at me from across the room.
I knew I’d love my son. But I didn’t expect to want to feast on his flesh. I tell ya, fatherhood is just full of surprises!
Next week, we’ll talk about how I am occasionally struck by the urge to French kiss my beautiful boy, right on his sexy mouth.
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