18 Aug

Dad and Buried Posted in discipline 2 comments

Empty Parenting Threats

When it comes to getting your kids to do something they don’t want to do, there are basically three tactics you can employ: bribery, threats, and just giving up and doing it for them.

Doing it for them is obviously not the way to go. Detective Munch is lazy enough as it is; if I were to start waiting on him hand and foot (or waiting on him even more, which I guess would make it waiting on him hands and feet? COMEDY GOLD!), he’d probably end up with bed sores.

As most parents already know, bribery is a double-edged sword. It works, but you’re gonna pay for it down the line when the kid refuses to get out of bed without the promise of a new toy or some TV time, and eventually you’re buying him a new car just to get him to go to college.

Which leaves us with threats.

03 Aug

Dad and Buried Posted in Lists No comments

Fair Comparisons

If you’ve spent anytime on my blog, you probably know I’m no stranger to a good list.

I have written a lot of them, and almost all of them are collections of hilarious AND TRUE ways that children or parenting (or writing lists!) is/are like other things, like prison or homeless people (or writing lists!).

Comparing children to non-children things is a popular pastime, and an easy way to both let off steam and give non-parents an idea of what the child-rearing experience is like. Most of the time the comparisons are extreme, because everyone knows exaggeration is the absolute funniest thing in the history of the universe. But they all have a kernel of truth.

So which are the funniest and most fair comparisons? I’m glad you asked.

Parenting Job Titles

When you’re a parent, you take on a lot of roles.

You’re still the person you were before you were a parent (to varying degrees), but now you’re also the person your kid knows as Mommy or Daddy. And then you’re the million different things your kid needs you to be over the course of the day.

If this were a resume it would 30 pages long.

Read more about Parenting Job Titles …

09 Jul

Dad and Buried Posted in discipline 11 comments

Terrible Tips for Flying with Kids

On Tuesday, the Huffington Post shared an article called “9 Things Kids Can Play With In-flight That Don’t Involve Technology” and I’m still laughing at this list.

I’ve read a lot of stupid things in my life, many of them on this very blog. But I’m not sure I’ve read anything quite this delusional lately. (And I once compared my son to a bird!)

I may not truck with parents apologizing for flying with kids, but I would never willfully abuse my fellow passengers. Which is essentially what these suggestions boil down to.

15 Jun

Dad and Buried Posted in Future 2 comments

11 Ways Parenting is Like Watching “Game of Thrones”

Last night, another season of “Game of Thrones” ended in bloody, punishing, somewhat dispiriting fashion. (Don’t worry, no spoilers here!) Of course, it’s nothing you’re not used to already if you’re a fan of the show.

Or if you’re a parent.

I’m not crazy enough to suggest that the experience of raising children is anywhere near as savage – or as sexy! – as the world of Westeros. But I am crazy enough to suggest that the experience of watching what may be the most popular show in the world has a lot of things in common with parenting.

Eleven things, to be precise…

Dad and Buried

Category: Lists

Empty Parenting Threats

Like this:

Fair Comparisons

Like this:

Parenting Job Titles

Like this:

Terrible Tips for Flying with Kids

Like this:

11 Ways Parenting is Like Watching “Game of Thrones”

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this: