Toddler Jail

Babies are portable.

Stick them in a stroller, strap them to your chest, graft them to your stomach Kuato-style and you’re all set. Take them with you while you do some grocery shopping or grab some lunch or pound a few beers; you’ll barely even notice the kid is there! So much so that back when I used one of those strap-on things (not what it sounds like!), I often had to stop and make sure my son was breathing!

Contrary to almost everything you hear, babies are actually fairly convenient. You might even go so far as to call them “low maintenance.” And once you’ve had a glimpse of the future, you definitely will.

Especially when you’re stuck in toddler jail.

Playtime’s Over, Junior

Most people think technology makes our lives better, and that living back in the days without electricity would have sucked. I tend to agree. But there were some things about those days that might have been pretty cool.

Especially the child labor stuff.

29 Feb

Dad and Buried Posted in Babies 3 comments

Toddlers are Crazy

My son is an anarchist. It’s not really his fault, since all toddlers are anarchists. But it’s just a stage he’s going through. I hope.

Maybe they’re not anarchists in the true sense of the word, since they aren’t so much about politics or even abolishing or ignoring rules; they don’t exactly grasp the concept of rules, so it might be a little unfair to label them that way. But it’s clear that they hate rules or boundaries of any kind, even if they can’t articulate why.

Regardless, living with an anarchist is hard work. And whether my son is technically an anarchist or just behaves like one, the end result is essentially the same: CHAOS.

Child Abuse

My son has been involved in a few violent incidents recently. And I’m not just talking about the constant finger-biting he does when we try to brush his teeth, though that is not fun either. I don’t care if you’re Batman, getting bit HURTS.

Thankfully, my son has not yet shown any signs of being a biter – it’s almost hard to blame him for the biting he has done, seeing as it only happens when we stick a bubble-gum flavored finger in his mouth.

No, the violence I’m talking about is the hand-to-hand kind. Well, the hand-to-face kind, as in my son’s hand and another kid’s face.