I love my kids, I just hate parenting
This blog isn’t exactly known for its positivity.
If I’m not (facetiously) trashing my kids, I’m (facetiously) trashing myself, or I’m (facetiously) trashing other parents. What can I say, trashing things is fun!
To paraphrase Shakespeare, every once in a while, I come not to bury, but to praise. Today, I’m looking on the bright side, and sharing some of the positive traits I’ve passed down to my two sons.
A few weeks ago, the Buried clan went on a road trip during Detective Munch’s spring break.
We spent a few days in Washington D.C. and then spent the latter half of the week, and Easter weekend, with Mom and Buried’s family in South Carolina. Then we drove the full fourteen hours back while The Hammer battled a fever and the world’s most prolific runny nose and we battled headaches, frustration, and traffic.
Spring break ain’t what it used to be…
I still remember the night I got a call from my oldest friend and he told me his wife was pregnant. I’ve known this dude since the second grade (Turkey Hill Elementary School Class of ’88 represent!) and he was the first friend of mine to become a parent. It was a big deal.
I was young at the time, and drunk at the time (and maybe other things at the time?) and I had some strong suggestions for how he should raise his child. Living the single life in Southie, having kids of my own was still a long way off for me, but that didn’t matter. I had OPINIONS.
Even just thinking about it makes me hate myself. I knew nothing. More than 12 years later, I still know nothing. Nothing except the stuff I wish I hadn’t done.
Children are expensive.
And not just like, “Wow, I didn’t expect it to cost that much!” expensive, more like, “Wow, the cost of this item is really cramping my style, I should probably return it!” expensive, and maybe even “I bet if I sold this I’d make a fortune!” expensive.
They’re the kind of expensive that makes you question your life choices. Parents need some guilt-free spending to offset our crushed dreams.
Parenting comes with a lot of rules.
Whether you’re a strict mom or a cool dad (or vice-versa!), when it comes to raising kids, there are a million dos and don’ts. Some of them are universal (do feed them, don’t show them pornography, do brush their teeth, don’t let them drive, etc.) and some of them differ by household (for example, you don’t let your kids watch TV, whereas my 6-year-old woke up with nightmares about last week’s Legion; to each their own!)
But in our weakest moments, and we all have them, every parent wants to ditch the rule book. Every parent wishes there were certain things s/he could get away with, if not for society and laws and potentially scarring/endangering our kids.
What kinds of things? I’m glad you asked!
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