Benefit of the Doubt

Benefit of the Doubt

Over the weekend, someone on my Facebook page told me that because I use the Cry It Out method, I’d broken my son’s trust in me, and another said I was cruel and heartless. These were people I’ve never met, who have never met my son, who have never been privy to my relationship with my son, who have no earthly idea what actually went down, how my son reacted, what the circumstances were, etc.

I don’t get offended very often, or by very much. But being told by complete strangers that I am damaging my relationship with one of my kids and that I don’t care about his well-being because they don’t agree with the way I sleep-train? That got me.

Judge me for crying it out. Judge me for letting my kids watch too much TV, for giving them too many toys, for co-sleeping or calling them assholes on my blog or vaccinating them or using my phone when I’m with them at the playground. I don’t care. Some of that is probably valid.

But don’t question my love for my son(s!).
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We Are All Zookeepers

We Are All Zookeepers

You love animals, right?

Of course you do, because who doesn’t love animals? (Mom and Buried!) Of course, there’s a difference between loving animals and devoting your life to them, and I wish someone had told me that before I became a parent, because what are young children but animals without fur?

That’s why I relate to this month’s 1 in 100 Million video. Being a parent and being a zookeeper aren’t all that different.

But don’t take my word for it.

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The Vengeful Wife’s Holiday Gift Guide

The Vengeful Wife’s Holiday Gift Guide

Moms, I know you love your kids. But don’t you kind of wish you didn’t have to go through pregnancy to get them? I know you love your husbands too, but isn’t it frustrating that they don’t have to experience the grueling marathon of labor?

Damn right it is.

Mom and Buried is at the tail end of a grueling year, and (after you take into account her irresistible looks) she has no one to blame for it but the guy who knocked her up. I know how hard the last nine months have been on Mom and Buried, so you can’t tell me she wouldn’t love a little revenge. I bet you all would.

This holiday season, you’re in luck!

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Problematic Childhood Misconceptions

Problematic Childhood Misconceptions

Kids are gullible. And stupid. And loud. And annoying. And lazy. And way too energetic…

Sorry, lost my train of thought for a second.

The point is, kids will believe anything. Believe me, I know; I’ve tested this. Extensively. And I will continue to test it, both to keep verifying my findings like a proper scientist and because lying to children is so damn entertaining!

At least for a while…

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Is Your Child Gifted?

Is Your Child Gifted?

When my son was in preschool, we received an informational packet about how we could get him tested for NYC’s “gifted” programs. We decided not to bother.

Not because we don’t think he’s got potential, but because it just seemed like unnecessary stress for a four-year-old. Besides, if Detective Munch is some kind of supergenius, we’ll find out eventually (and laugh all the way to the bank!)

I’m glad we passed on the testing, because last week I saw an article on PopSugar called “Signs Your Child May Be Gifted” that takes all the guesswork out of determining whether your kid might one day be able to buy you an island*.

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