I was supposed to keep track.
I was supposed to tally all the miles I walked with Detective Munch and Mom and Buried, as part of the “KINDMilesMatter” campaign. But I blew it. Rather, my son blew it.
Because kids ruin everything.
Last week, I wrote about my son’s need to use a nebulizer when his chest gets congested – from his allergies or from a cold.
It’s not the sexiest rig in the world (unless you find Immortan Joe sexy, and if so: YOU’RE SCARING ME), and the first few times we had to put it to use, it was a little freaky. And he wasn’t a lot into it.
Luckily, we discovered that the length of a commercial-free TV show on Netflix matches almost perfectly with the length of the nebulizer treatment. Letting him watch a show while taking his medicine became a convenient solution.
At least, it was convenient, before my son got clued in.
Sometimes you just get lucky.
In my ongoing attempt to become the primary destination for parents who want to talk shit about their children, I am occasionally afforded some fun opportunities from brands who have a sense of humor or who haven’t actually read my blog. I got to participate in a photo shoot with Dove Men+ Care, I’ve written about some cool products, I’ve even been on a podcast or two. (Not lately though, AHEM!)
Every now and again, someone will reach out with an offer that seems to have little connection to my blog or even my life, like when a company that makes air purifiers asked me if I’d like to try one of their products.
You wouldn’t think such a thing was necessarily in line with my content, and normally it wouldn’t be. But as “luck” would have it, Detective Munch had just gotten some bad news from the allergist…
Is there anything more enticing to kids than a bouncy house?
Is there anything more nerve-wracking for parents than a bouncy house?
Most of these unregulated party props serve as manic mosh pits full of kids ranging from toddler to teen, and every one of them leaves their brain outside along with their sneakers. The only thing worse than the maelstrom that ensues should you try to prevent your kid from setting foot inside one of those things (forget Deflategate, Inflategate is REAL!) is the heart attack that ensues while you watch them navigate the bouncy box of doom.
Some holes just weren’t meant to be squeezed through, whether you’re wearing shoes or not!
(Allow me to apologize IMMEDIATELY for that imagery.)
It’s not always easy to make exercise a part of your life, especially as you get older and other things take priority, like drinking, and not exercising.
But having kids is no excuse. Not because it’s easy to squeeze in the gym when you have parental duties, but because we parents actually get a ton of exercise without even needing a gym membership. Especially when our kids our younger.
It turns out that a lot of the stuff I would do at the gym, I’m already doing at home. Take a look at my parental exercise equivalency chart to find out if you are too.