Bored Kids Are Not My Problem

Bored Kids Are Not My Problem

Bored kids are the worst.

Kids hate being bored so much it makes them blind. Blind to the hundreds of toys staring them in the face, blind to the dozens of books within arms reach, blind to the open space and fresh air in the backyard.

They hate it so much it makes them deaf, too. Deaf to their parents reminders of all those toys and books. Deaf to their parents’ threats that if they don’t stop complaining about being bored, all those toys and books will be given to someone who will actually use them!

About the only thing it doesn’t make them is mute, because bored kids literally never stop telling you about it.

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Have I Already Ruined My Kids?

Have I Already Ruined My Kids?

If you’ve read this blog before, you’re probably no stranger to my anxiety as a parent. If you are a parent, you’re probably no stranger to it either. Parenting makes paranoids out of all of us.

In the past I’ve written about the general stresses of the gig, and I’ve occasionally focused on my fear over my own shortcomings, and how they might affect my kids. lately, I’ve been less concerned about how my parenting might eventually ruin my children, and more worried that it already has.

Have I already ruined my kids?

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Things Parents Wish We Could Get Away With

Things Parents Wish We Could Get Away With

Parenting comes with a lot of rules.

Whether you’re a strict mom or a cool dad (or vice-versa!), when it comes to raising kids, there are a million dos and don’ts. Some of them are universal (do feed them, don’t show them pornography, do brush their teeth, don’t let them drive, etc.) and some of them differ by household (for example, you don’t let your kids watch TV, whereas my 6-year-old woke up with nightmares about last week’s Legion; to each their own!)

But in our weakest moments, and we all have them, every parent wants to ditch the rule book. Every parent wishes there were certain things s/he could get away with, if not for society and laws and potentially scarring/endangering our kids.

What kinds of things? I’m glad you asked!

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The End of The Laziness

The End of The Laziness

Everybody loves a rainy weekend.

You wake up a little later than normal, you stay in your pajamas a lot later than normal, you lounge in bed or on your couch with a big mug of hot coffee, under a blanket, and you watch some mindless TV, or a some movies you’ve seen a hundred times. It’s glorious.

Unless you have kids, in which case none of that will ever happen ever again for the rest of your entire life.

Because kids don’t let you be lazy.

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The New Year’s Resolutions Every Parent Wishes Their Kid Made

The New Year’s Resolutions Every Parent Wishes Their Kid Made

We’re only three days into the new year, and if you’re anything like me, you’ve already broken your resolutions. Of course, if you’re exactly like me, you never bothered making any resolutions in the first place because ew.

I’ve never found them helpful, personally, but I do wish I could get Detective Munch to make a few. Despite my best parenting efforts, there are some things he still needs to commit to that would improve quality of life for both of us in 2017!

You’re not gonna believe this, but I went ahead and made a list of them.

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