I love my kids, I just hate parenting
Kids have an endless capacity for repetition.
I dare you to count how many times yours say “no” or “why” over the course of an afternoon, or how often they want to watch another episode of “Octonauts” or “Rescue Bots”. Sometimes even the same episode!
Children just don’t seem to get sick of things. Parents, on the other hand…
Sometimes you just get lucky.
In my ongoing attempt to become the primary destination for parents who want to talk shit about their children, I am occasionally afforded some fun opportunities from brands who have a sense of humor or who haven’t actually read my blog. I got to participate in a photo shoot with Dove Men+ Care, I’ve written about some cool products, I’ve even been on a podcast or two. (Not lately though, AHEM!)
Every now and again, someone will reach out with an offer that seems to have little connection to my blog or even my life, like when a company that makes air purifiers asked me if I’d like to try one of their products.
You wouldn’t think such a thing was necessarily in line with my content, and normally it wouldn’t be. But as “luck” would have it, Detective Munch had just gotten some bad news from the allergist…
Read more about Giveaway: Allergy Relief from Venta Airwashers …
“If you want the unvarnished truth, ask a child.”
So the saying goes, and it’s true. In fact, you don’t even have to bother asking. A child will come up to you, unprompted, and lay you bare in an instant, without a second thought, without even bothering to look back at the mound of ash left in his wake.
Why is honesty a virtue again? I don’t want my kid to be a liar, but a little bit of tact wouldn’t kill anybody. (Especially me. I’m really fragile right now.)
![[E-card] Bite Club](https://i0.wp.com/dadandburied.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/fight-club.jpg?resize=500%2C233&ssl=1)
The first rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club. The first rule of Bite Club is you never stop talking about Bite Club.
Seriously, if someone bites you, scream bloody murder and alert everyone in your vicinity! Biting is NOT acceptable, even if you’re just a toddler.
Because I don’t care if you’re Batman: getting bit HURTS.
Everyone knows children get special treatment. We whine and complain about how annoying they are, frustrating they are, how stressful they are, and then when they actually do something worthy of punishment? We treat them more leniently than the NFL treats the Patriots.
We’re so blinded by stupid unconditional love that we give our kids more free passes than CVS gives coupons. Never is this glaring inequality more prominent than around the holidays.
Mother’s Day gifts are the perfect example.