As a result, my friend at AskYourDadBlog – a far nicer, far more successful, far more irritating outfit – thought he’d be clever and insult my recent rash of list-making by suggesting a new one, called “10 Ways Having Kids is Like Writing a List About Things That Are Like Having Kids.”
Joke’s on him though, because I DID it. And it’s glorious. And it fills me with (more) self-loathing.
10 Ways Having Kids is Like Writing a List About Things That Are Like Having Kids
- Making them is a real pain in the ass
- Everyone gets angry at you if you name them something stupid
- Create more than three and everyone thinks you’re crazy
- Create only one and everyone wonders why you don’t make more
- You hope everyone likes how it turns out but mostly you don’t care because you’re just happy to have gotten through it
- Sometimes it’s a struggle to remember why you even bothered to begin with
- Someone’s always telling you what you did wrong
- Swear too much and people ask you to tone it down
- Using bullets is frowned upon
- Sometimes you don’t even like doing it but you power through in the hopes that it gets you on The Huffington Post
That actually turned out pretty well. I’m kind of inspired to make more! Thanks, John!
Please send all suggestions for future lists along, because we all know they are easy and fast and have a tendency to go viral. Why do you think there are so many?
(Go visit John’s blog, where he writes a bunch of touchy-feely stuff that everyone loves because he’s like a cuddly little bunny rabbit and everyone loves bunny rabbits. EXCEPT ME.)