This Is Your Parenting On Drugs

This Is Your Parenting On Drugs

There are a lot of reasons a parent might want to lighten their load with a little help from their friends, whether said friends be alcohol, marijuana, Xanax, or boarding school. You have kids. You get it. Sometimes you need to relieve some stress. Parenting on drugs is tempting, to say the least.

I haven’t sent my kids away (yet), and I’ve never been much of a pill guy (there but for the grace of God and all). So these days I mostly drink. Kids have a tendency to make that necessary. You’re on Facebook. You get it.

There was a time — way back in college — when I might have done a little more than drink. Lately, now that the stigma is gone and the criminality is going away as well, I’m wondering if it might be time to explore a return to Honalee with everyone’s favorite magic dragon.

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Reading and Weep

Reading and Weep

Since September, my first-grader’s reading skills have exploded.

He went from being nervous about reading in front of the class to pointing out every word he sees to reading full books on his own – and being excited to do it. It’s been amazing to watch the growth over the course of the school year, and while I was never worried about him being behind in some imaginary race to another developmental milestone, it’s definitely gratifying.

I’m excited for the growth to continue and to be able to introduce him to some of the many books I loved when I was a little dude. Of course, as is the case with every new skill your children acquire, there are some drawbacks.

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Guy Dye

Guy Dye

If you have kids and you haven’t gone gray yet, either stop lying or just give it time.

There are days I can practically feel my hair changing color as it’s happening. Which is usually when my 6-year-old is throwing a fit about having to go to bed/having to go to school/having to take a bath/having to eat dinner/having to do his homework/etc.

Going gray is a part of getting older, and a part of parenting, and I’m okay with it. I’m not vain. Besides, a little salt and pepper worked out great for George Clooney and I’m nothing if not exactly like George Clooney!

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Switch Played

Switch Played

I didn’t exactly grow up bonding over video games with my dad.

For one thing, video games didn’t exist when my dad was a kid – they only barely existed when I was a kid! – and by the time my brothers and I were playing Coleco, he couldn’t have cared less. I seem to recall some initial fascination with the first Nintendo when it came out, but my father had neither the time nor the inclination to sit down and play Super Mario Bros or Metroid with us. So video games had never stuck out to me as an opportunity for quality parenting time.

Until now!

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