The other day, I was left home alone with my two kids. For a few hours I tasted the life of a single parent.
It didn’t work out.
As soon as my wife walked in the door, I put down the baby and picked up the bourbon. I won’t lie: I was drinking to forget — to forget the stress, the scrambling, and the screaming. I had spent a few measly hours managing my kids all by myself, and it was enough to rededicate me to my marriage for another 10 years.
At least.
Thankfully, I’m not a single parent, and neither is my wife. But we have a baby, and due in large part to her lady parts, she’s taken on the lion’s share of the work. I’m sure there have been occasions where she feels like a single parent, but I do my best to prevent that feeling by sharing the load, because I’m not a lazy deadbeat stuck in the past.
I’m looking at you, dads who don’t pull your weight!
I know, I know: #NotAllDads! Of course not all dads are bad dads! And lately, it’s fewer and fewer dads are bad dads. More men are staying home with their kids than ever before, and men are more involved in the parenting process than ever before. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t some Neanderthals out there who could use a nudge in the direction of the 21st century.
It’s 2016, equality and feminism and Ryan Reynolds, etc. Fathers who actively participate in parenting aren’t superheroes (so stop treating them like they are), but those dads who don’t lift a finger to support their wives and raise their kids? They are villains. I’m not a superhero, or the world’s greatest dad, and there are plenty of things I screw up as both a father and a husband. But I try. And it’s the trying that separates me – and all the other guys who recognize that parenting is a partnership, not a solo bolo (shout out to Comedy Bang Bang for some reason!) – from the bad dads. And the bad husbands.
Those two things go hand in hand, because bad dads tend to make bad husbands.
I have a seven-month-old baby, a five-year-old son, and a there’s-no-way-I’m-mentioning-her-age-online wife. We are a family, and as such, we are a team. We assist and support each other, by which I mean my wife and I assist and support each other and our kids do nothing, because a baby can’t do shit and my five-year-old refuses to. FYI, when I said “we assist and support each other,” I mostly just meant “we let each other take the occasional nap.” And despite recent findings, she needs more naps than I do. So I do my best to let her get them.
Look, babies need to eat a lot. My son is hungry every few hours, and that includes the middle of the night. It’s a hell of a burden for a breastfeeding mom, having to be at the beck and call of this biological ball and chain, and if you’ve ever seen a baby and its mother, you know that feeding the kid is only a small piece of the pie. Babies want their mommies, and mommies love their babies. But mommies need a break. And that’s where Daddy comes in.
It’s not easy being a baby’s primary source of calories, comfort, and companionship, and she deserves the occasional respite. All moms do. I can’t breastfeed our infant, but I can bottle-feed him so my wife can get some sleep, or get sauced, or go to the spa. So I do.
If the kid will take a bottle and my wife is exhausted (if?), I’ll tell her, “Sleep through! I can handle the middle-of-the-night feeding!” (And catch up on the DVR.) If her friends invite her out for a girls’ night, I tell her, “Go ahead! I can feed the kids and put them to bed!” (Provided we have some Benadryl.) If she is desperate for a nap on a Saturday afternoon or to sleep in a little longer, I say, “Get to it! I can handle the kids!” (We have Netflix.)
My kids definitely prefer my wife, and that’s fine. She’s the favorite parent (even if most of the reason moms get that role is because of biology, stupid inseverable nine-months-in-the-womb-based bond!) and that’s not always easy. What is easy is being her favorite spouse. All we dads have to do is our part. It’s not 1950 anymore, guys.
And remember, women can use Ashley Madison too.
A slightly different version of this post originally ran on Scary Mommy.
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Reading this was very comforting. The fact that there may be more men out there that actually appreciate the tough work us moms do is encouraging. My husband is amazing and although I may be harsh on myself for needing a nap or break, he always assures me that I deserve it. As a stay at home mom, I feel guilty for being tired when he’s going out there and working. “Atleast I get paid to work,” he jokes. However, it is true! Not only do good dads make good husbands, good husbands make good dads.
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I’ve been researching paint protection film for a while, and
it’s so good to hear redal feedback like this. Does anhone
know how it holds up over time? I’m looking for something long-term.
I just had my car wrapped recently, and I can’t stop staring at it!
It feels like driving a new car again. Plus, tthe wraap protects the paint underneath,
which is a hge bonus.
Gret article! I’ve always wondered if PPF is worth the hype.
It seems like it would save so much time on maintenance
while keeping the car looking new. Anyone here tried it long-term?
I used to spend hours waxing my car every few weeks.
After getting PPF, I don’t have to anymore.
The shine stays perfect, and it’s aved me so much effort!
Really enjoyed thos read. I’m considering a ceramic coating for my car because I’ve heard
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brands or installers?
I’ve had ceamic coating on my car for about a year now, and I can’t recommend it enough.
It’s soo much easier to clean. If you’re on the fence, just do it.
This was super informative! I didn’t realize ceramic coating could block UV rays.
I live in a hot area, so this might save my car’s paint from fading.
I recently investe in ceramic coating for my car, and I’m so glad I did.
It adds a layer of protection, and I don’t stress over small scratches
anymore.
I’ve been debating between PPF and regular waxing. Reaing this post convinced me that long-term
protection is the smarter choice. Anyone else made
the switch?
My car’s ppaint started showing tiny chips ffrom highway driving, so I
looked into ceramic coating. Best decision ever.
It’s like having an invisible shield on my car.
Highly recommend it!
Thanks for this post! I recently wrapped my car, and tthe matte
finish turned out better than I imagined.
It’s also great kmowing the paint underneath is protected.
I’ve been seeing a lot about ceramic coaings lately and
wanted to know if it’s worth it. After reading this, I think
I’ll give it a shot—it seems perfect for
kdeping a car clean without constant upkeep.
This was shch a helpful read! I didn’t realize how much
certamic cokating helps prevent scratches. I drive a lot, so thuis might be the solution I’ve been looking for.
I wrapped my car lasdt year, and it still llooks incredible.
It’s a funn way to refresh your caar while protecting the
paint underneath. Definitely recommend it if you want
a change.
For anyone debating ceramic coating, jst go for it!
I hhad it applied to my car, and thhe difference is huge. The paint stayss flawless, and I’ve had so many compliments.
Really interesting post!I’m curious about how long ceramic coatings actually
last. Does anyone here have experience with them after a couple of years?
I was skeptical about PPF at first, but after trying it,
I’m a believer. My car looks spotless all the time, and
I don’t stress about scratches or fading paint anymore.
Has anyone tried ceramic coatings for their car? I’ve been thinking about upgrading my ride,and
this post jjust convinced me to look into it more
seriously.
I can’t recommend PPF enough! It’s saved my car’s paint froim so many small scratches and chips.
Plus, it still looks shiny months later.
I loved reading this! I had no idea ceramic coatings could
makke such a difference. I’m seriously considering it now for long-term protection.
I recently wrpped my car with a custom finish, and I get compliments
everywhere I go. It’s such a fun way to stand out.
If you’re considering it, I sayy go for it!
This was super helpful! I was on the fence about getting PPF, but after reading this,
I think it’s worth trying. Easy maintenance soinds
like a win-win.
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Mortgage brokers are real game-changers! They make the
process of securing a home loan so much easier.
If you’re looking for guidance, their expertise is invaluable!
Great insights! Working with a mortgage advisor saved me so muych time and stress when buying
my home. Highly recommend getting professional help!
I never realized how much a mortgage broker can simplify the loan process.
They helped mme find the best rates andd explained everything so
clearly.
This article highlights just how crucial mortgage brokers are.
If you’re looking to buy or refinance, don’t go it alone—get expert advice!
I used a mortgage advisor when buying my first home, and it was a game-changer.
Their knowledge helped me avoid cosstly mistakes and save money!
Loved reading this! Mortgage brokers really do save you time by
comparing loan options. Definitely the smarterr choice if you’re in the market for a home.
I agree, mortgage brokers are essential for finding tthe right deal.
They take the stess out of navigating all the different
loan options available.
I wish I knnew about mortgage bromers sooner. They helped me secure a great deal,and the process was smooth rom start to
finish.
Mortgage brokers are a must for anyone looking too buy a home or refinance.
They make sure you’re getting the best deal possible—highly recommend!
Great article! Mortgage broker truly provide value by finding the best deals and
walking you through the whole process with ease.
Couldn’t agree more! Using a mortgage broker saved me from wasting
time on loan offers that didn’t fit my needs. It’s thhe way too go!
As a first-time homebuyer, I fellt lost inn thhe mortgage world.
But a mortgage advisor made the process clear, simple, and stress-free.
The mortgage world can be overwhelming, but a mortgage broker simplifies everything.
I’m so glad I made the decision to work with one.
Refinancing was something I didn’t want to deal with, but my mortgage broker made
it easy. They helped me get a much lower rate—thanks again!
I’ve worked with mortgage brokers for years, and I can’t recommend them enough.
They’re the reason I’ve been able to secure grfeat rates every time.
Great advice! I always recommend using a mortgagbe
broker—they provide clarity and make sure you understand all
the fine prijnt off your loan.
Using a mortgage advsor was the best decision I made when buying my house.
They really know how to find the riight solutions for your financial situation.
I never thought about using a mortgage broker untiol reading this.
They really take the pressure off by comparing lenders and offering expert guidance.
This is a great reminder of why mortgage brokers are
soo essential. Their expsrience and knowledge help clients avoid unnecessary pitfalls.
Amazing read! Mortgage brokers are like having a trusted guide
in the often confusing world of home loans.
They are defiinitely wortfh considering!
I’ve worked with mortgage brokers in the past, and
their guidance iis priceless. They really help you
save timme and money in the home-buying process.
Mortgage brokers make a big difference, especiakly if you’re a first-time
homebuyer. They explain everything and ensure you’re making the best financial decisions.
Mortgage brokers helped me get a lower rate and a better deal on my home loan. If you’re looking for help, they’re the way to go.
If you’re buying a home or refinancing, you should definitely
consider working with a mortgage broker. They take thhe stress out of the entire process!
Fantastic article! Mortgage brokers are truly essential for navigating today’s complex
mortgage market. Their expertise makes all the difference!
Have a look at myy blog post Local new build mortgage services.