02 Nov

Dad and Buried Posted in Future One comment

Balls of Steel

In September, as part of a campaign celebrating America’s unsung workers, I wrote about my father-in-law’s career as a truck driver. It gave me some insight into what his job is like, and allowed me to eliminate “truck driver” from any future job searches.

You think I’m joking, but it took me a long time to figure out what I wanted to do with my life and by “a long time” I mean, I’m still not sure!” Truck driving might have stayed on the table. I’m determined to help my son find his way sooner than I did, and now that I’ve seen this month’s “1 in One Hundred Million” video, I know he will.

I have found his one true calling.

Letter to My Firstborn

Among the many things on my mind as we prepare for the arrival of our second kid are my son’s feelings.

Welcoming a new baby to the family is going to be an adjustment for everyone, but the little boy who will suddenly be sharing a house, his toys, and his parents’ affection may have it hardest of all. No, my (eldest) son won’t be changing (many) diapers or getting up to feed his little brother (at least not all the time), but he’s not gonna be the only kid in town any more, and it won’t always be easy for him.

So I thought I’d take this opportunity, in the final stretch of calm before the storm, to reassure him.

28 Oct

Dad and Buried Posted in ECard One comment

Monsters are Real

I don’t really understand why some parents dress their tiny children as monsters for Halloween.

Aren’t they terrifying enough already?

Counter Programming

We ration our son’s screen time.

At this point, he only plays a handful of tablet games, so “screen time” is still mostly “TV watching time,” and we try to limit it. If he’s going to become a couch potato, it’s at least going to be when he’s old enough to watch legitimate programming. There’s no need to binge watch “Dinotrux”.

Of course, sometimes we need him to watch something, just to get him out of our hair. And one of the joys of TV in 2015 is the ability to stream shows whenever we want. We’re not slaves to the programming schedule. But we are slaves to our kid.

So if we need to get something done, we’ll throw on Netflix and let him go to town. (But not “The Town.” He’s too young for that much Affleck.)
Read more about Counter Programming …

23 Oct

Dad and Buried Posted in Advice One comment

Take This Under Advisement, Jerkweed! – Volume 12

Nobody wants my advice much these days. even though a highly respected and totally anonymous website I’ve never heard of just called me a cross between Louis C.K. and Homer Simpson, which may or may not be a compliment?

I used to run these columns fairly regularly, but now, even when I bang the drum for questions, I hardly get enough to fill the space. Which is a shame, because my advice is not only terrible and potentially damaging, it’s funny and potentially damaging. But without questions, I can offer no answers.

Thus, this may be the last edition of Parental Advisories. You have only yourselves to blame.

Dad and Buried

Balls of Steel

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Letter to My Firstborn

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Monsters are Real

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Counter Programming

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Take This Under Advisement, Jerkweed! – Volume 12

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