06 Jan

Dad and Buried Posted in Blogging 9 comments

I Don’t Want to Hate My Son

I’ll say it again: I don’t hate my son.

I get frustrated with my kid and he pisses me off and he acts like an asshole (it’s in his genes) and I’m not afraid to say so (to everyone other than him), but I don’t actually hate him. If I did hate him, I certainly wouldn’t write about it, even in character. Which is the problem.

I enjoy playing “Dad and Buried”, exaggeratedly mocking my son and bitching about being a parent, even though I actually love my son, and I love being his dad. Except since he turned four, I haven’t been loving either of those things very much.

And it’s cramping Dad and Buried’s style.

05 Jan

Dad and Buried Posted in Blogging 2 comments

My Top Ten Posts of 2014

If you follow my Facebook page, this might be a bit redundant for you. But after two weeks of drinking and eating and drinking and drinking, I barely have the energy to keep my eyes open, let alone write a new post. So I’m milking this “year in review” thing one more time.

2014 was a good year for Dad and Buried. I moved back to Brooklyn after 18 lackluster months below the Mason-Dixon line (they do things differently down there), got a few sponsorship opportunities with which I annoyed half my readers, and increased my exposure by infuriating people who read the Huffington Post.

So to ease myself back into the swing of things, I’m kicking off 2014 with a list of my ten most popular blog posts of 2014.

31 Dec

Dad and Buried Posted in Charts and Graphs No comments

My Most Popular Images of 2014

This was a pretty good year for my blog. Nothing really went viral, and I’m not famous yet, but I managed a steady output of posts, and I even managed some decent “Wordless Wednesday” images and ecards.

Today, being Worldless Wednesday, I figured I’d share the ten most popular images – including some custom ecards and a bunch of rudimentary charts and graphs and stuff. I stress “rudimentary” as I’m no artist.

But I hope some of these made you laugh.

Enjoy, and I’ll be back tomorrow with my top 10 most popular posts of the last year!

24 Dec

Dad and Buried Posted in Photo 6 comments

Happy Holidays!

This is probably the last day of 2014 that I won’t wake up with a hangover… and yet I still don’t have it in me to write a blog post.

Thankfully it’s Wordless Wednesday, so here’s a picture of my son from two years ago.

Maybe it’s not exactly what you wanted, but don’t be a spoiled brat.

What Parents Want for Christmas

Growing up, when I asked my parents what they wanted for Christmas, they always made a (sad) joke out of it. They knew my brothers and I didn’t have any money, so they didn’t bother asking for anything real, like a new car, or a box of Cuban cigars, or a new furniture set.

Instead, they used Santa the way someone might use a genie: by asking my brothers and me for things that were abstract, theoretical, and totally unattainable. Just to make a point. They’d make requests like, “for you and your brothers to get along” or “a little peace and quiet” or “for you to behave.” Just totally insane shit that would never happen in a million years.

Now that I’m a dad, nobody ever asks me what I want. But if they did? I’d reply exactly the same way as my mom and dad. Because I was wrong; they weren’t joking.

The intangible, imaginary stuff really is what parents want for Christmas.

Dad and Buried

I Don’t Want to Hate My Son

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My Top Ten Posts of 2014

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My Most Popular Images of 2014

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Happy Holidays!

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What Parents Want for Christmas

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