Mom and Buried and I aren’t all that big on Valentine’s Day.

I know what you’re thinking: you’re kidding yourself, pal. Which is a fair point; anyone who has ever met a woman knows she cares about Valentine’s Day on some level. But I know my wife. You don’t get through five years of marriage without being able to tell when your spouse is bluffing. Believe me, I’ve gotten it wrong enough times to get it right at least one out of every ten chances. And she’s not bluffing about Valentine’s Day.

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