05 May

Dad and Buried Posted in holidays 11 comments

Mom Fails

Let’s face it, when it comes to parenting, moms already get all the praise. (Not that I’m complaining.)

Sure, that “praise” often calcifies into “being taken for granted,” which is just about complaint #1 from women everywhere (along with “I want more romance/passion!” and “socks go IN the hamper, not NEAR the hamper!”) but if you think about it, it’s a positive thing! Abilities and skills are only taken for granted once someone comes to rely on them. Kudos, moms everywhere! You’ve raised the bar for yourselves.

Unfortunately, that bar is often just a little too high for your liking. So I’m going to level the playing field with some mom fails!

How to Be a Funny Parent on Twitter

There are thousands of hilarious parents on Twitter. Of all stripes.

Many of them are featured in the Big Book of Parenting Tweets, and I am flattered to have been selected alongside so many funny moms and dads (I’m in the brand-new sequel too!). There are stay-at-home dads, working moms, gay dads, single moms, goofy dads, nerd moms, asshole dads (that’s me!), etc.

Aside from being parents, about the only thing we all have in common is our constant drinking. Which, of course, is one of the key steps towards being a funny parent on Twitter.

29 Apr

Dad and Buried Posted in Charts and Graphs 2 comments

Supermessy

Today’s Wordless Wednesday (with some words) revolves around my son’s current obsession: superheroes.

He’s constantly pretending to be one and frequently enlists me in exciting battles, during which he’s usually wearing a costume and always jumping on my private parts.

While I may occasionally sport a mask or two during these games, he almost always wears a cape.

He has a lot of capes.

Worse Than Breastfeeding

Earlier this week, I poked fun at the recent trend of celebrities bravely “normalizing” breastfeeding by doing it in public. The idea is that movie stars and models and whatever the hell Kardashians are can help remove the stigma around public breastfeeding.

Despite the fact that breastfeeding is as normal as it gets, this movement to remove the shame many women feel in regards to feeding their children is actually necessary. There are whole bunches of people who can’t stomach the sight of a woman breastfeeding in public!

On my Facebook page, I wondered – rhetorically – just who these garbage people are, going around making women feel shame over feeding their kids? Because I guarantee you, most of them have behaved far worse. We all have.

22 Apr

Dad and Buried Posted in Charts and Graphs 5 comments

The Parental Exercise Equivalency Chart

It’s not always easy to make exercise a part of your life, especially as you get older and other things take priority, like drinking, and not exercising.

But having kids is no excuse. Not because it’s easy to squeeze in the gym when you have parental duties, but because we parents actually get a ton of exercise without even needing a gym membership. Especially when our kids our younger.

It turns out that a lot of the stuff I would do at the gym, I’m already doing at home. Take a look at my parental exercise equivalency chart to find out if you are too.

Dad and Buried

Tag: funny

Mom Fails

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Supermessy

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Worse Than Breastfeeding

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The Parental Exercise Equivalency Chart

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