Men Who Get Sick and the Women Who Hate Them

9 Dec

On Sunday I caused a little controversy on my Facebook page (give it a like!).

I posted a joke – FYI, that’s pretty much all I do on Facebook, it’s definitely all I do on Twitter, and it’s mostly on here… and in real life – about the way Mom and Buried dotes on our son when he’s feeling a little bit under the weather, and I mentioned how it’s the opposite when I get sick. Instead of going maternal, she goes Medea (not the Tyler Perry character). The claws come out and all I hear is how I’m needy and whiny and need to ‘man up’ and etc.

Some of the women who read that post got a little huffy about it, but I stand by my original point.

Women love taking care of their sick sons but hate taking care of their sick husbands. And they don’t realize they’re the problem.

MjAxMi00MGFlMWNhMmU2OGViNjM4 300x210 Men Who Get Sick and the Women Who Hate ThemI love the way my wife takes care of my son. Seeing the way that she loves him, I’m surprised there’s any love left in the rest of the world. And while he’s at a troublesome age where our patience is consistently tested – if not our affection – we’re still far from the trials and tribulations of teenagehood and the ability to gauge our son more as a real, almost-fully-rounded person and less as a cuddly bundle of our genetics. As such, he gets a pass.

He could be throwing The Fit to End All Fits, but if he sneaks a cough in there, her maternal-meter goes off and it’s snuggle-and-soup time.

I’m not knocking it; my mother did the same for me when I was growing up and also last week when I was home for Thanksgiving. That maternal instinct is one of the great things about having a woman in your life. My wife’s love for my son reminds me a lot of my mom and I’m going to end this sentence right now before I get myself into trouble.

The problem is that after growing up with such a great mom, I was predisposed to seek out a woman with similar characteristics and again this sentence is a week on the couch waiting to happen so I’m cutting it short. I’m just saying, if I wasn’t used to a receiving a certain level of service god I keep walking right into these. Let me cut to the chase.

STOP BABYING US AS BABIES AND MAYBE WE WON’T EXPECT TO BE BABIED AS MEN.

stop acting like a lil bitch wife 540 219x300 Men Who Get Sick and the Women Who Hate ThemJust because biology has infused women with greater instincts towards nurturing and protecting their loved ones (has it? Science was never my forte.) doesn’t make it our fault that we like it when you take care of us. You ladies set the precedent as moms and then expect us to go cold turkey as adults? NEVER!

(No, I can’t explain why women don’t become as pathetic as men when they’re sick but it’s probably because moms don’t love their daughters as much as they love their sons I’m just spitballing here but I saw what happened to Mischa Barton in The Sixth Sense and remember at the top of this post when I said I’m always joking?)

Sure, maybe we men could make do with a little less whining and a little more powering through because we’re adults who can take care of ourselves and not helpless little children but sometimes a guy just wants to be tucked in and be spoon-fed some soup and put on a diaper and pretend to be an adorable little I’VE SAID TOO MUCH.


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4 Responses to “Men Who Get Sick and the Women Who Hate Them”

  1. Sean December 9, 2013 at 2:09 pm #

    As always, I got a good laugh out of this. My wife is similar, but we’ve come to a bit of a compromise so far as my sons are concerned. For whatever reason, I’m usually in charge of sickness confirmation. She’ll ask something like “does he feel hot”? If I think so, some babying may ensue; if not, it’s generally business as usual. It’s a bit odd, but it works.
    Sean recently posted…Surviving the Holidays: Part 3My Profile

  2. Brian Stephens December 9, 2013 at 5:56 pm #

    I thought the funniest moment was going to be…

    “My wife’s love for my son reminds me a lot of my mom and I’m going to end this sentence right now before I get myself into trouble.”

    But it continued into deeper territory and I kept looking over my shoulder to make sure my wife wasn’t reading along. I think I’m safe.

    Tough to tell a 3 yo son to “man up” when he’s sick, but the point seems valid based on the actions of grown up men when sick.

    I have a house of girls (4 by last count). Mom is great when they are sick, but not full on doting. I usually just give them the Heisman to avoid sickness myself, so that’s probably an indication of where the tough female comes from for the sickness thing.
    Brian Stephens recently posted…Cycling Training Plan: 30-Day Challenge – Planks Week 3My Profile

  3. Amber December 11, 2013 at 9:45 am #

    I love this. As one of those women, I love the humorous way that you share this truth.
    We do know what you mean when you compare us to your mothers but it is just so much fun to see how deep you can dig that hole while trying to get out of comparing us to your mothers.
    Amber recently posted…You know your illness is rare when…My Profile

  4. Christopher Stiphout December 11, 2013 at 5:59 pm #

    Loved this!

    My logic center started churning away… this may all be rationalizing BS, but my 2 cents:

    When adults are sick, we feel like crap, just like our kids. We want all our responsibilities to go away, just like our kids (granted, their responsibilities seem MUCH less to us, but they’re just as challenging to them as ours are to us).

    The only differences, to me, are these: one, kids have someone whose explicit JOB it is to take care of them, and two, no one suffers permanent damage when a KID blows off their responsibilities.

    That being said, when we adults are sick, we deserve care and sympathy. Just so long as the responsibilities of the carer and the caree are both still met. No one wants to hear whining and complaining, but for some it’s a legitimate coping mechanism, so when one of us whines about feeling crappy, it’s the OTHER one that needs to “man up” and dig for some sympathy to give.

    Shouldn’t be too hard; the other one isn’t sick and tired.

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