Health Scare

Do you like being scared? It’s October, so there’s no better time, right?

Well, forget vampires and mummies and werewolves and celebrities without makeup, I have a foolproof way to give yourself the willies:

Have kids.

When I was younger, I never gave much thought to my health. Thankfully, I was lucky and never had much reason to. And then I got older. And then I had a kid. And started calling myself “Dad and Buried” and alluding to a grave in my logo. parenting, health, health insurance, healthy dad, #healthydad, anxiety, stress, fatherhood, kids, family, life, lifestyle, mortality, contest

Needless to say, my outlook has changed. I’m steadily approaching the Rubicon of 40; I know I’m not invincible anymore. And despite what he seems to think, judging by his daily behavior, I know my son isn’t invincible either. So I’ve been thinking about health a lot more than I used to. When I’m not obsessing about all the ways Detective Munch could get hurt, my mind turns to all the ways I could get hurt. It’s a vicious cycle of anxiety.

Right now I’m in a “me” zone.

I was recently invited to participate in the HealthyDad campaign, which includes a contest in which you can film a video of yourself being a #HealthyDad (see the contest rules here). I can’t win the contest myself because HAVE YOU SEEN THESE GUNS? I mean, that’s just unfair. But I have benefited from thinking about my own health routine and also seeing myself on video because wow I’m a hippo! That can’t be healthy!

I really am trying to be healthy now that I have a kid and I want to witness him conquer the American Ninja Challenge someday. I also want to stay healthy so that I can try all the new beers will come out between now and 2080 yes I know that’s somewhat counterproductive BUT THIS IS MY LIFE!

Anyway, like I said, parenting is scary enough even when you don’t obsess over the details. But it’s not easy to avoid doing that when you’re researching the health insurance options that are out there, and it includes this list:

“Essential benefits must include items and services within at least the following 10 categories: ambulatory patient services; emergency services; hospitalization; maternity and newborn care; mental health and substance use disorder services, including behavioral health treatment; prescription drugs; rehabilitative and health maintenance services and devices; laboratory services; preventive and wellness services and chronic disease management; and pediatric services, as well as oral and vision care.”

GULP.

Thanks for having my back on all that stuff I guess but also can you come help me right now I’M HAVING A HEART ATTACK after reading that list! Well-played, Empire Blue Cross Blue Shield. You’ve done scared me straight… to my insurance provider.

I don’t suppose I’ve ever wanted to die, but I’ve never wanted to die LESS now that I’m a father. And I certainly hope I’ll never have a need to utilize a solid 95% of that terrifying list up there (I’ve already done the newborn care thing and let me tell you that was traumatic enough!) So I’m trying to be healthy-ish. And even though I’m totally lying about that (see aforementioned beer reference), I am going to cover my ass a bit with some health insurance.

Because everybody needs a little backup, especially when you’re responsible for backing up someone else.

Disclosure: Empire Blue Cross Blue Shield compensated me for this post, in which I’ve attempted to scare dads into being healthy. I understand that you’re upset, I’d be upset about the scare tactics too – if they didn’t work! You should be thanking me. Also, in case you somehow didn’t know by now, I’m not a doctor; I’m only a parent. For some reason you don’t have to go to school to become one of those.

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